Games With Love
by Krissy2lip
Summary: If you play the game you have to take the chance of getting burned. But Noll didn't think he would be licking his wounds. Not this girl she was different, then why did this happen? How did this happen?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I am Not the Author of any of the stories I write about and there for Do Not Own any rights to any of the Orginial Stories and/or Characters.

A fool boasts of those who fear him; a wise man's pride is those who respect him.

We all play this one even if we don't want to consider it as such. Fool's only play games with Love. So are we all fools? Out to get what we desire. Affection without loss, receiving without giving any of ourselves in return. I'm sure you have heard the statement that human's are selfish creatures by nature. You don't act with the thought of abusing and using your fellow man but so tragically that's what you get in the end when we all are out to protect ourselves from heartache.

That's it. That's probably as poetic I'll get so take it or leave it. Of course I know millions on billions on trillions of quotes. But that's just it the words and meanings are not mine they are of much more famous and mostly dead writers which I would be just reciting and I am not here to give you a poetry lesson I am here to tell you of life after I left.

Sitting in first class with my elbows on my knees, my hand balled up in fist and holding that fist at my lips trying to push the scream I was going to let out back as best as I can. When my hands aren't holding back my mental dialog from turning into verbal dialog they where racking thru my black as midnight hair.

'What am I doing here?' 'This isn't how it's suppose to be! She -... Don't go there Oliver don't go there.' 'This(Mum,Dad,Gene,Lin) is my family ,has always been and always will be.'  
"Noll will you please sit still in your sit if you fidget anymore the flight attendant is going to come over here and start asking silly questions, like 'sir are you afraid of flying?' or something along those lines." I scoffed at what Lin said but it was true I looked like this was my 1st flight or my last by the way I was wiggling like a 5 year old child in my sit.

"Lin am I? ... Never mind! Forget that I said anything." Now I added a bounce to my knees that went rhythmically with me biting my fist and hair racking.  
"The truth?" Lin said not looking at me seeing if that would calm me down. Like the swat team trying to coxes a jumper down without said jumper jumping.  
I didn't respond but I didn't tell him to mind his own business so he knew to go on with his thoughts. I stared straight ahead trying to focus so I was actually listening to what he said and not my internal dialog. I stop the bouncing and fist and hair racking sat in my chair properly prepared to listen.  
"Yes and No." the older gentleman sighed and continued on "You're in a strange predicament... On one side you should be going home with me and your brother's body so that we can be there for your family." Lin was right I'm being selfish I should be there for my mother and father to help them thru this difficult time. I'm such a bad son. "On the other hand once you find the one you want they say to never let them go. If that's the saying regular humans use than it makes me thing how hard it will be for 'Our Kind' to find 'the One'."

I can feel my brother beside us in the conversation I was having with my guardian (Well in Japan at least when we got home it would be a different story) Gene was reveling his presents to both of us something he hadn't done in along while. Lin didn't need my help knowing what Gene would say Lin's shikki would just tell him.  
Gene was nodding his head at everything Lin was saying and trying to rub my back. "True very true." his sighed heavily. "But then also say if love something let it go and returns to you someday it your's to have and to hold." "And if it does return it's wasn't yours to have in the 1st place."  
'Thank You dear brother but how is that going to make me feel any better? Hmm?' I had closed my eyes now that we we're on the tar mat about to take off.  
'We can always stop the plane little brother.'  
'No that would be silly because nothing has changed that much between now and a couple of days ago for me to see any reason in staying here longer than needed.'

The straw that broke her was the game we played. She was suppose to fight back like any other time we didn't see eye to eye on things. Well really most of the time we did see eye to eye but I love to argue and she was my(2nd) favorite person to bicker with like litigating lawyers in front of a judge. Not wanting to give in to the other side's demands. But when I saw udder defeat in her eyes I knew she didn't think I was playing anymore and that she was taking what I said seriously that hurt me to the core. I can't believe she thought what I said was true! Even I knew just by touching her that it wasn't true but for the woman in front of me was second guessing her feelings for me. That all it took was me saying that maybe it wasn't me that you love but my brother. Agggh!

'You know and I know that's not true Noll.'

'Oh I know but tell that to the girl I love.'

The stupid game we played finally played us in the end causing doubt about our feelings in the end. Than it caused me more pain to also know the girl I cared about might actually care more for my brother like every other girl in the past. To make me think she was like all the others made me literally sick to my stomatch when I thought she was so different.

A week ago  
I was perched on the highest cliff I could be without losing the conversation the men below where having about the now waterproof /leek proof tarp that looked like a cocoon. I could heard her walk up next to me I didn't move she was always ok with the way I was before but now for some reason she reluctant to stand next to me.  
So I tried to help her feel a little more comfortable by shifting my weight and leaning against one of the two trees far enough from the cliffs edge to survive up there. When she didn't start talking I did. "Is there something you needed?" I said not looking at her trying to keep her from getting scared by what emotions my eyes where holding. I crossed my arms in front of me. "Am no not really I just wanted to ask you a question?" she wasn't even looking at me! I was so mad at the fact that she couldn't even look me in the face. I want to see what kind of questions her eyes held. "You just did so I guess you can." I don't think she got the joke in the answer. I would never turn down any question she wanted to ask me ever. I wanted to give her everything she wanted from me and more just to be selfish and have her by my side. But if she was going to act like this then she should of gone home when I told her to and wait there for this to be done. I mean sure SPR was going to be closing as soon as we got back but I would need her there to help pack she was my assistant still after all.

"Why did you come to Japan?" of course I have been going over and over this part of our conversation for the past couple of days while packing up the SPR office alone, Lin packed up the condo we shared. I explained to her that I saw what happened to my brother and I came here looking for his body and killer. Of course she knew the other reason to right? The paranormal activity the only answer I would give anyone till now. I didn't think I had to repeat that to her again but maybe now that I think about it I should of. With her sad look starched into my eyes now; and I clearly didn't expect the conversation to end like it did also. I said it to get a rise out of her to make her argue with me right now because I felt comfort in us bickering like this. I was expecting" Your stupid how can I love a man that's dead I only see him in my dreams but I see you every day I enjoy every day with you more" but she didn't she actually took what I said seriously.

That's when I found out that I was ready for us to go the next step but she wasn't especially when Mai just sat there like I just crushed her world. I came closer and saw she was crying. "I always thought he was you or my minds dream of you not that he was a real person, let alone your twin brother." I didn't say anything to this, what was there to say. "I didn't know." I was crushed; when I touched her, her heart told me that I was the one she loved. She enjoyed our fights and making me tea even though she complained most of the time. She knew I was the biggest Teddy bear when it came to her right? For once she was using her mind and not her heart but this wasn't the time for that. I also get that she didn't want to act on feelings and be wrong.

How would you take this? I can't cause Mai more conflict by me telling her how I feel about her. It would just make her more confused. So I just went with it. "Don't worry you'll see him again someday." I tried to sound like my dream for our Life together wasn't slipping away. "And I'm sure he'll still visit you." that was my way of saying she wouldn't be alone. This time I'll comfort and show here I truly care but giving her words and psychical support even thought I wished Mai knew she loved me so we could be moving ahead as a couple and supporting each other in our loss of my brother, me in never seeing him again and in Mai never getting a change to meet my charming brother for real. But I know Mai would totally see thru his act just like she saw thru mine.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I am Not the Author of any of the stories I write about and there for Do Not Own any rights to any of the Original Stories and/or Characters.

They say home is where the heart is I am going to agree with that saying now.

I lay awake in bed after being back a couple of days I realize something being back home sleeping in my parents' house in my old room feels a little off to me. I am trying to think of why this feels strange to me.

I finial got it and now I don't know what to do with this new information.  
I'm soon to be 19 an adult in many people's eyes. Society picks and choose when it's ok for them to call you a man or say you're still a boy.

I also was a little annoyed because I felt the same way myself. That I wasn't dictator of my own choices. But that I realized all changed when I moved out of my parents house. I mean I just didn't move out I moved to a whole different country and made it for a whole 2 years on my own. Had my own job and business, I even had irregulars/employees and I guess I finial felt the freedom of being finically independent.  
Which made me realize something else my parent's house isn't my home anymore. Yes, yes I know it will always be home being my parents are here but it will never be MY home anymore.

I was afraid of becoming attached to Japan not just psychically but mentally but that's not what happened. I became attached to Japan because the symbol of the freedom it held. The freedom of choosing what goes on in my own home. Example my parents house means they get to choose who comes and goes, What type of furniture the color of the walls, the house help. They get to pick everything down to the laundry soap we use. I guess being here I realize I miss making those choices on my own. Even the insignificant and tedious ones. 

Also it makes me realize how much I miss my brother. The last time I was here I had just got back from a conference to touch my hoodie my brother borrowed (his was always losing his on the train) and seeing his death flash right before my eyes.  
I have mixed feeling about my brother and what happened to him. I mean I miss him I truly do I mean I don't think anyone misses as much as I do maybe close siblings that raised each other would to an extent. But we where twins and on top of that connected not just with the normal twin talks but we were in each other's heads. I noticed Gene took up a lot of our personality and I was ok with that because I knew he enjoyed the attention but now I don't know what to do with that open space. I mean sure I do have my own bruiting personality but I still feel like I'm missing the sweet to my sour.

God I got to stop thinking about her, I feel like slamming my head or preferable someone else's head against the wall's of my room right now. I wouldn't have to give up my brother or her if she was here. I guess things will get better in time like they say.

Now of course being the workaholic I am I have already had a meeting at the (corporate) office regarding the case footage Lin sends to corporate after every case Also they have this idea of me using and discussion Mai as my human example of psych powers. My publisher wants me to write a book on her!

Of course for her to stumble on us, the chance of studying raw psych talent from its infancy age to being fully completely mature and practiced is unheard of but I don't want to go back and do that. I'm not going to use Mai as my own special guinea pig and I don't want to open up any wounds for me and or for her in the process. I don't want Mai to think that I just want to use her for my own gain anymore than she does now. 

Yes I have been not getting enough sleep if you really want to know and the fact that I have gone back to the staff here at the house making my tea and I have the odd feeling they didn't not miss my sour moods. I have been drinking less of my caffeinated beverage. Of course when I'm at home and my mum is too, she's always willing to do anything for me but I know it's just her trying not to think of my brother.  
I was pondering today if Mai and I had seen I to I on our feelings if she would of came back with me at least for the summer. I wondering if Mai would of helped my mother get of her loss a lot faster because that they are both very emotional creatures. Mother would probably be prodding Mai for information about me and what happened while in Japan and I'm sure Mai would let one of my eventful trips to hospital out and then I would be nagged about it for at least half a day. Mai is so like Gene in her fun loving life way that maybe she would of fit right in that Mai would of been welcomed with open hearts and arms from my parents.

God I really do love her look at me I'm sure I look like a hot mess. I miss her smiles, and pouting that was one of my favorite things about her.  
Maybe if I do go back after this whole mess cools down maybe Mai would be willing to meet my parents as my girlfriend.

Maybe this whole mess is making me jealous of my brother. The fact that he gets to see her everyday and talk to her in her dreams. To protect her like I want to be able to do. He is there for her in every way I'm not.

I've seen it in his head she lets him hug her and Kiss her on the forehead and hold her hand.

God something so simple as my dead brother holding the hand for the girl I love is making me jealous. I think I might need help.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I am Not the Author of any of the stories I write about and there for Do Not Own any rights to any of the Original Stories and/or Characters.

I officially hate the holidays.  
I thought I loathed them before but now I have more valid reasons to hate them.

University is on Winter Holiday so I have nothing to keep my mind, ok maybe not my mind but my body physically busy. The already busy streets are full of people who look like cattle herded into stores by the holiday sales to get them to come in the doors to spend money on people they see maybe once a year on gifts that person doesn't even want or need. And now you have wasted time and money for nothing.

Plus the holidays remind people how utterly alone they are in this world. I am the odd man out, the third wheel. Also I'm batting 1000 in the relationship department.  
This is my second year without my brother which is hard in its self because he was the bringer of good tidings and I was the loner watching everyone hang out. I was the blemish on the perfectly wonderful occasion full of cheer. Well that's what I thought of myself at least.

Also the first time I have missed a person that could be a candidate for a significant other for me.

Mai last year was so happy just to have people to celebrate Christmas with. She made me upset with her holiday glee because she reminded me of the person I was looking for at the time. I knew I was being harsh with her about the tree she set up in the lounge area that I didn't scold her a second time about it. Just because I was feeling alone in the world didn't mean I had to make everyone around me feel the same way. That would have been selfish and childish of me.

So now this year I can add Mai to the list of people I miss. I don't know what is going on with my emotions. I use to be fine, I didn't need or want anyone in my life, oh how I've changed. I hope it's for the better.

I try not to show my distaste for anything that reminds me of Mai around my family but my mother of all people notices. I think that maybe everyone notices but they are just nice enough not to rub salt in the wound like my mother ends up doing.

Like decorating the tree day I was out for the day until I knew my mother wouldn't be waiting up for me anymore and turned off my phone. And the next day I left early so I wouldn't get a speech from my father about missing important family traditions and how I upset and worried my mother was about me not being there and that's not how the son they raised would act. But they actually let me be and didn't bring up anything about it. They also didn't say anything to me about going to church as a family they had no problem with me skipping that one as well. Maybe they didn't want to me around to put a damper on everyone's day by being myself.

God I wonder how everyone had been able to put up with me until now. I know there were a couple of times in the past that Lin wanted to strangle me but really. I have never been friendly. Gene was my buffer he was the extreme ying to my distasteful yang. So it would rub off on people that maybe I wasn't too bad. Then they would be alone with me without my brother, big mistake.

Mai was like that too she evened my extreme out and even dealt with people so I wouldn't have to or as she would say so I won't scare them away. "Not everyone can get use to the heartless way you act towards everyone Naru. It's a skill that has to be perfected." "Well Mai then you are still a novice at this because you are still nervous to be alone with myself in a room." Of course that would get her going. I loved teasing her it was so fun and she would never hold what I said to her against me longer than a couple of hours.

I can't get away that easily though my mother keeps on trying to push me to contact Mai and make myself feel better about her and myself. But that would only be self and for my piece of mind and would probably end up wrecking any chances of a relationship with her. Who am I kidding I sure I have wrecked any chances of a relationship with Mai already. My mother said to these thoughts "Noll, Everyone longs for the emotionally bonds, even if it a temporary bond of friendship during this time of year." "And knowing her she will take the stretched out hand with the olive branch in it as just a friend being a friend but I think you know that already you are they one with the problem."

It's true I am the one with the problem; I didn't want to find out that Mai was holding up better than I was. That she could go on with her live without me because I was never a significant part of Mai's life to begin with. To have to remember that I was the one who was too chicken to try to be anything other than her boss. Knowing that I'd most likely be confronted by Mai about what I said to her during our last serious conversation and not be able to keep lying about my feelings. And end up longing for Mai even more than I do now because after hearing her sweet friendly voice that makes you feel like you just got a good hug I will want more than to just talk I will want to see her again.

I can't open myself up like that. I feel selfish, no spoiled like a spoiled brat who had Mai all to myself and didn't want to share her with anyone and definitely didn't want to even try to share myself with her because she will just end up being hurt by me in the long run and I couldn't live with myself if I was the one who had hurt Mai like that. Because my way of thinking is that I will end up hurting the people I care most for if I show my emotions and loss control of my powers around them.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I am Not the Author of any of the stories I write about and there for Do Not Own any rights to any of the Original Stories and/or Characters.

_Arthor Notes: Sorry was planning on posting this awhile ago like after christmas! I'll make it up to you I promise! I have an idea for valentine's day. _

_I may or may not run with that idea. I felt bad for Noll because he was so sad like one of my comments said. So please Enjoy!_

I was in the study when I heard them. The staff outside the Door playing Rock-Paper-Scissors to see who was the lucky person to come in and disturb me in my cave. I hope they decided soon because their chatter was causing me to loss my place in my reading.  
Finally they decided on the person and said person knocked. "Come in."

They sent the youngest in you could tell she wasn't enjoying being alone with me. She had a crush on me and my brother a long time ago but we had crushed her dreams.  
She looked at me and then pointed out the door and then back. Had she just magical gone mute? I wasn't complaining if she had but I knew that wasn't the case. This was making me irritated. "Is there something you need? If not I would like it if you left and not disturb me again with your confessions. I don't desire to hear them.

She straighten out and stood proper "No young master that not it at all." She paused. "There is someone on the phone who is asking for your mother or Miss Mori but they are both out. And the person doesn't speak very good English so it's hard for us to tell them to call back. We were wondering if you would convey the message to them." I nodded she had a look of relief on her face as to say that was easier than she thought. "Alright transfer the call in here and I'll talk to them." "Yes right away young master." she was bowing on her way of the room leaving as fast as she could without running because that would be rude.

The phone rang on the desk in the study. That was fast I said to myself. I walked around the desk to sit in the chair and answer the phone I picked the receiver up. I was guessing the person needs me to speak in Japanese seeing the staff came and sought me out. (I'm going to write the conversation in English because it's easier for me ) "I heard you where looking for My mother Mrs. Davis or Miss Mori well there not in at the moment but I'll gladly take the message down and give it to them." I was trying my best to be nice to said person on the line they didn't deserve my foul mood.  
Very Long pause that almost made me sigh.

"Oh that's alright Naru I was just calling to tell your mother and Mori-San a happy new year and to thank them for the presents they sent me."  
For all that is holy in the world the one person I was trying not to tomtit myself over was right here just a breath away.  
"Oh really that was nice of her I'm guessing she sent you one from me?" I smirked at this. Any chance my mother got to buy presents she would sent Mai one from everyone she could without the said persons knowledge of sending a present.

Mai laughed her voice was so sexy oh my god it was killing me. But I wasn't complaining because I was enjoying this very much.  
She smiled "Yes a couple actually." "Would you like to know what you got me?" Joking so she wasn't dumb she knew they weren't from me. And she wasn't mad about it. This is good.  
"Of course I need to know what I'm taking credit for."  
"Well for starters YOU got me a Juicy Couture set of matching gloves, scarf and a cap(beanie). There an off white color."  
Wow she knows me I wouldn't step a foot into that store it was too girly for me but how did my mom know that would be something right up Mai's alley? Mori, Young flirty and feminine just like Mai.

"Should I just tell all of the gifts because they match each other."  
"Ok go on then."

"Well they matched the jacket of the same color. That was from your parents. Really I don't know how your mom did it but it fits perfect."  
"A matching necklace, earring and bracelet set. Sliver with gold accent, again from "you". Flats and very cute house slippers, a few pairs of jeans, some blouses and a few T-shirts from Mori-San." she took a breath "A long sweater, a cardigan, a couple of dresses, and tracksuit from your parents again." "A big wallet, a small wallet, a wristlet, a big purse, a book bag, more shoes, heels, flats, a couple of pairs of sunglasses, a set of each perfume they have and a set of iPhone covers." she sighed. I chuckled. "Seriously Naru did your mom clean out the store? Because I think she might have gone a little overboard?"

"Mai I have figured out by now that I need to have the same outlook on my mother's shopping as my father has."  
"oh really and what's that?"  
"She's not hurting anyone so just let her be."  
She said a like confused "Well I guess but that was way too much." I mean that's not even everything." "She also bought me gift cards to places, and gave me a gift from SPR well that what it says." "Before you ask she called it a bonus check!"

"Well I can't fix was she's already done. (I pinched the bridge of my nose at the headache my mother was causing and she wouldn't even here. Finishing my thought of with) And I wouldn't dare return any of it if I were you she will be livid about that and I'll have to hear about how ungrateful you are so I would just expect it and.."  
Mai cut me off "oh no no no I enjoy all the gifts tremendously. I'll expect them but if she keeps this up I won't have any room in my closet by next Christmas." she had a smile in her voice.

"Well I'm glad you enjoy your gifts and I expect the thank you's in knowing you enjoyed what I got you and tell everyone your ok with expecting more gifts in the future."  
I smirked. She gasped again "Oh no please don't tell your mother that god knows what she's buy me next!"  
I mumbled but I know she heard me "Better you than me that's all I'm going to say."  
"Naru! Don't throw me to the sharks!" I laughed the sharks are my mother and Mori-San. "Oooo, this is so not funny!"  
"Maybe not for you but from my stand point you can definitely see the humor."

She was stewing I could just remember the little half pout she does and it sobered me up a little I was so going to regret this contact with her when I hung up and I think she felt that way too.  
She laughed again I'm guessing thinking about something. "Well, Naru thank you for your "gifts" it was very generous of you." "And tell your mother a Mori-San thank you from me too will you?"  
"Of course Mai. And I take full responsible for the gifts and the thank you's for them too seeing that you liked them and expected them." "of course you would." she laughed.  
"and maybe in the future I might actually send you more gifts seeing that you enjoy the things you have already received from me, and it doesn't bother you." it was my form of a question and she knew that much about me I'm sure. It was me asking if that was ok for me to really show her how I feel about her if she was ok with that.  
"I would really enjoy that. Please do." she was embarrassed with telling me she was ok with me expressing my feelings for her and she was clear now? Maybe it had been a couple of months since our last conversation.

"If I let you send me presents will you be more open with me?"  
"When Have I never been?" "I just don't freely give out information but if you want to know all you have to do is ask it's not my fault your too afraid of me to ask."  
"I am not." Oh to see her expression.  
"Yes you are Mai if I was there in person you would have never even gotten out that you enjoyed your gifts."  
"Ok." "But it's so hard your very intense Naru. And sometimes it's hard to deal with that."

I sighed I closed my eyes and did the pressure point on them and then pinched the bridge of my nose for a second time. "Mai you are the worse liar I know."  
"Ok so it's hard talking truthful with you when I'm not being true to my feelings about you."  
"With how self centered you make me out to be I would think you know I'm ok with talking about myself."  
She laughed "I guess I never thought of it that way." "I just amused that you didn't want to know about my feelings and that you would think of my feelings as childish and not take me seriously."  
"Ok maybe your right at 1st that would have been so true but now…"  
"Noll don't say anything more your reasons for saying I was in love with your brother was to weasel your way out of how I feel for you and you know it."  
"Well maybe I have changed my mind."

"What? You are ok with expecting the way I feel oh of course now that there's a continent between us?" " Oh no Oliver you're not getting off that easy."  
"ok I see your point if I was there and you weren't afraid of being alone with me in a room together would it be ok if we told each other how we feel?"  
"Yes I think so as long as you take me seriously and believe me when I say I'm not in love with your brother."  
"I think I can expect that."  
"Well I miss you all of you guys."  
" You wouldn't believe me if I said I missed you too."  
"What the great Oliver Davis misses little old me?"  
"I know I must be losing my mind. I should get my head checked."  
"I think you miss my tea."  
"Hmm, Maybe or maybe not."

"It's late there Mai I think you should be getting ready for bed. I don't want you blaming your being late to school on me keeping you up."  
"It's only 9:30 Naru! I'm in high school not middle school!" "But your right I should get off the phone I don't want to see my phone bill."  
"Well that's my fault tell my mom I said I'd pay for it."  
Mai sighed at me again. "Naru you don't... I don't need you to do that I can manage on my own."  
"I know you can don't argue with about Mai ok just let me."  
"Ok. Please tell your mother I called and tell her and Mori-San thank you."  
"I will."  
"I would say Goodnight but seen as it's 12:30 in the afternoon there.."  
"You can still say Goodnight to me if you like." I smirked.  
"Ok Goodnight Naru."  
"Goodnight Mai."

I hung up the phone at sat there at the desk for awhile.  
Then I had a thought 12:30? My mother is so dead she did this on propose because she was having a lunch in meeting with one of clubs today and knew she wouldn't be here. But I would.  
I walked into the hall way and one of the maids walked passed.  
"Young master is there something you needed?"  
"When is my mother expected to be home?"  
"1."  
"Thank you that's all."  
"Yes sir." the maid went on her way.  
Just wait Mother just you wait I'll be waiting for you.


	5. Chapter 5

7/17/11

I apologizes for not updating my stories I have been busy with my new job and life. Right now I have a tooth infection that is making the whole left side of my face swollen. The doctor gave me Vicodin/Lortab and antibiotics so I'm really sleepy.

I have not given up on my stories so don't worry.

I actually have at least two chapters for all my stories in my computer that need to be edited and than are ready to go. I do apologies again I never thought I'd be one of those authors that took forever to update but I guess I am.

I will replace this update with a the new chapter when ready to update.


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